The Stress Meme

I see coaches, therapists, psychologists share articles, links, tips and strategies about stress. And 99,999% of them is all about how to ‘manage’ stress.

Tips from cleaning up a closet to breathing deeply, from binge watching TV to going out with friends, from meditating to hugging more, …

The list of things to do that which are advised by the experts is endless.

If all that stuff really worked we would know it by now, don’t ya think? It more speaks to the idea that nobody really has a clue what to do about it

Why do coaches, therapists, psychologists, … keep advising you to try out different buckets to catch the rain that’s coming through a leaking roof?

Unlike what is generally believed is stress not a given. Stress is not a natural consequence of our current societies. Unlike the memes that are spread it is not something we shall have to learn to deal with, learn to live with, …

Those are fatal memes, proving themselves right the moment people buy into them.

The moment we believe that meme, we put the locus for our own experience outside of us.

First thing to realize, the roof should not be leaking in the first place.
Second and more important: It’s way way less raining than you think it is.

Here’s something to sit with for awhile:

Stress is the consequence of an understanding wherein is believed that your experience is a direct result of the circumstances you find yourself in.

OK read that last sentence again.

Now you already intuitively know that this is not the fact.

Last time you were stuck in traffic, you were singing, smiling to people in the cars next to you, when you noticed that other driver who was freaking out, trying desperately to make the cars before him move faster.

How come in the same circumstances, we all have a different experience?

Might it be that stress (your experience) has really nothing to do with the circumstances you find yourself in?

I know that it’s a hard one to wrap your head around, but give it a go, sit with it. See it deeper than this. Because intuitively you know this to be true.

And that’s when you’ll be on the way towards a more stress free life.

Not by doing anything different or by managing, but by understanding the illusionary nature of stress.

‪#‎peaceofmind ‪#‎innatewellbeing ‪#‎stoptheignorance ‪#‎innateresilience

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Bart is a transformational coach, Three Principles facilitator and business mentor. His clients typically experience deep generative changes and will attain a more hopeful, deeper grounding in life and what's possible for them.
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